Alex Horne Quotes

Alex Horne

Profession : Comedian

Birth : September 10, 1978

I used to work in 'Big Brother' in the third series, I was a logger, which was the worst of all jobs, you had to sit and watch what happens and type it into a computer.

Alex Horne

I get asked, on a sort of daily basis, 'It's my wife's 30th birthday, can you set her a task?'

Alex Horne

I have children so I couldn't shave it off; my dad shaved his beard off once and we all disowned him. My wife's dad shaved his off and they freaked out. I think if you have kids, getting rid of a beard is bad.

Alex Horne

Mine is slightly ginger and patchy so it's not really a hipster beard.

Alex Horne

Katherine Parkinson has got a classics degree from Cambridge yet is an idiot - in the best possible way.

Alex Horne

I've always felt more scrutinized. It's definitely not bullying, because you can see how much I enjoy it.

Alex Horne

I can't stand jazz.

Alex Horne

I don't have courage in my convictions and I'm not interested in serious things or politics: if you're doing an hour of standup, you should talk about a few serious things.

Alex Horne

We're not ashamed of the old stuff, but when you look back at the posters it does make you think: 'My God, six men and one woman.' Weirdly we didn't say 'that's wrong' and no one else did, either. It's been a really quick shift in the landscape of telly, which is brilliant.

Alex Horne

I was inspired by 'Bootylicious' being able to scale the dictionary walls thanks to just one individual, Beyonce. But Beyonce has the world's ears, so what I had to do was to work my word - which is 'honk', as slang for money, really really hard.

Alex Horne

People are a lot less weird than they might seem.

Alex Horne

I have pretty unsophisticated tastes; I enjoy the videos on 'You've Been Framed' a lot - I don't think there's much that's funnier than people falling over. I prefer that to Bill Hicks.

Alex Horne

I definitely think everyone's competitive on some level, there's virtually no-one who hasn't cared at some point about something they've done.

Alex Horne

Somebody said 'I've got a task here, can you give it to my girlfriend?' And in the task it said 'Marry me'. It was really emotional and really odd, but that sort of thing's happened a few times, weirdly.

Alex Horne

I'm quite proud that my bird-feeders are always full.

Alex Horne

If you're a comedian, you can only really write jokes for about an hour a day, so you've got a lot of time to fill.

Alex Horne

Having live musicians in a comedy show adds a frisson.

Alex Horne

I get people using my admin skills to try to basically plan their wedding or stag night. They say, 'Can you just come up with six tasks for us on our hen night?'

Alex Horne

We had one task where we had a yoga mat on a big hill and told them to get three yoga balls at the bottom of the hill onto the mat. We didn't think that one of them would bring the yoga mat down to where the balls were, so that was a reminder that sometimes these comedians can be smarter than us.

Alex Horne

The Fringe is by far my favorite time of year; I like everything about it. But there are people I know who are much more successful than me who don't enjoy it.

Alex Horne