Chris Rock Quotes

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Chris Rock

Profession : Comedian

Birth : February 7, 1965

If you properly clean a room, it gets dirtier before it gets cleaner.

Chris Rock

Only married people understand you can be miserable and happy at the same time.

Chris Rock

When I do stand-up, I'm basically doing a one-man show.

Chris Rock

Who's judging American Idol? Paula Abdul? Paula Abdul judging a singing contest is like Christopher Reeve judging a dance contest!

Chris Rock

I'm severely overrated. I'm just above a hack.

Chris Rock

I'm severely overrated. I'm just above a hack. That should be the name of my new DVD: 'Chris Rock: Slightly Above Hack'.

Chris Rock

After I left high school and got my GED, I studied broadcast journalism for a year at a community college.

Chris Rock

If I find a comedy club where no one's camera works, I'll go.

Chris Rock

You can write a great country record and still be angry. Who's angrier than Toby Keith? He's angrier than the average 10 rappers.

Chris Rock

I love being famous. It's almost like being white.

Chris Rock

It's like, hmm, there's people with $2000 weaves that could have bought health care with that weave money. They don't have insurance. People want what they want. And I guess that is a reason we have this big credit card problem and a lot of these foreclosures.

Chris Rock

When I hear people talk about juggling, or the sacrifices they make for their children, I look at them like they're crazy, because 'sacrifice' infers that there was something better to do than being with your children.

Chris Rock

Does having a wife and kids change your act? Yes, but only in the best way. It gives you weight and authority. It also makes you closer to the audience because the audience is married and has kids.

Chris Rock

I'll go back to comedy clubs when they get a real no-camera policy, the same way they did with smoking.

Chris Rock

I'm in show business... I want to hang out with Janet Jackson, not Jesse Jackson.

Chris Rock

The thing that surprised me the most is just how much money women that weren't rich were paying for their hair. When you're in a beauty parlor in Harlem next to abandoned buildings and somebody's paying five grand for a weave, that's a bit much.

Chris Rock

Pretty girls have problems too.

Chris Rock

I've seen women who don't have great relationships with their dads, and it all comes down to this: You have to tell girls you love them every day.

Chris Rock

I used to hang out with grandfather all the time because he used to pick me up from school sometimes, or drive me to my mother's, so I'd be with my grandfather a lot. I used to watch him write his sermons.

Chris Rock

Black people have been qualified to be president for hundreds of years. George Washington Carver could have been president. I could go on with a list of black men that were qualified to be the president of the United States. So the Obama victory is progress for white people.

Chris Rock