Ogden Nash Quotes

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Ogden Nash

Profession : Poet

Birth : August 19, 1902

To keep your marriage brimming, With love in the loving cup, Whenever you're wrong, admit it; Whenever you're right, shut up.

Ogden Nash

If you don't want to work you have to work to earn enough money so that you won't have to work.

Ogden Nash

Certainly there are things in life that money can't buy, but it's very funny - Did you ever try buying them without money?

Ogden Nash

A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold.

Ogden Nash

People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up.

Ogden Nash

Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them.

Ogden Nash

Progress might have been alright once, but it has gone on too long.

Ogden Nash

Middle age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn't for you.

Ogden Nash

I hope my tongue in prune juice smothers, If I belittle dogs and mothers.

Ogden Nash

I think that I shall never see a billboard lovely as a tree. Perhaps, unless the billboards fall, I'll never see a tree at all.

Ogden Nash

The trouble with a kitten is that eventually it becomes a cat.

Ogden Nash

The cow is of the bovine ilk; one end is moo, the other milk.

Ogden Nash

A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.

Ogden Nash

There is only one way to achieve happiness on this terrestrial ball, and that is to have either a clear conscience or none at all.

Ogden Nash

Happiness is having a scratch for every itch.

Ogden Nash

Some debts are fun when you are acquiring them, but none are fun when you set about retiring them.

Ogden Nash

Middle age is when you've met so many people that every new person you meet reminds you of someone else.

Ogden Nash

Children aren't happy with nothing to ignore, and that's what parents were created for.

Ogden Nash

Professional men, they have no cares; whatever happens, they get theirs.

Ogden Nash

No, you never get any fun out of the things you haven't done.

Ogden Nash