Sebastian Maniscalco Quotes

Sebastian Maniscalco

Profession : Comedian

Birth : July 8, 1973

Growing up in an Italian family, we used our body to convey a message.

Sebastian Maniscalco

I go to Vegas now, and I'm in the casino, and I'm gambling, and there's a guy in a wet bathing suit gambling right next to me.

Sebastian Maniscalco

I remember when I was young, I was watching TV, and my father came into the room, agitated, and told me to start a business. I was eight years old.

Sebastian Maniscalco

I grew up in an immigrant household with an Italian father who came to the U.S. when he was 15.

Sebastian Maniscalco

Everybody seems to be wasting their time online. There is such a narcissistic attitude. It's such a strange world.

Sebastian Maniscalco

One of my biggest pet peeves is when a guy's wearing flip-flop sandals, which I don't understand. Men's feet are disgusting to begin with, but now they're on display when I try to go out for a nice steak at a restaurant, and I have to sit there and look at some guy's hoof? I don't get it. I don't understand it.

Sebastian Maniscalco

When I was growing up, we dressed up for church.

Sebastian Maniscalco

You go into Wal-Mart, and you see stuff you typically wouldn't see anywhere else.

Sebastian Maniscalco

That's how my family bonded - eating and telling stories.

Sebastian Maniscalco

If I can relate to the joke, it's going to be funny.

Sebastian Maniscalco

Every heckler is unique because they say something, and you react to what they say or what they're wearing or who they're with, so every response to a heckle is unique.

Sebastian Maniscalco

I've never seen a weirder group of people than at the post office. It looks like people are crawling out from under rocks to go to the post office.

Sebastian Maniscalco

I developed a knack for storytelling early on around the kitchen table with my family. I just happen to be a funny guy.

Sebastian Maniscalco

I'll never stop doing stand-up. There's nothing better than getting in front of 2,500 people and making an entire room laugh.

Sebastian Maniscalco

It took me a good eight to ten years to really formulate what I was doing onstage and start to get really personal with comedy. I always really had timing naturally, it was just about trying to figure out how that timing was going to work onstage.

Sebastian Maniscalco

I used to devour a lot of stand-up comedy in my cousin's basement. He had cable and I didn't, so I went there and saw all the comedians.

Sebastian Maniscalco

I don't like long jokes. I like stories rather than setup punchlines.

Sebastian Maniscalco

Although my values and my morals are old-school, you have to kind of key into the landscape of social media and how the world is progressing. I'd be a fool to sit there and go, 'Yeah, let's use the telephone to telemarket myself'... Social media is something that I definitely have to tap into, to another demographic.

Sebastian Maniscalco

The business of being told to earn a dollar, that no one is going to give you anything - that was kind of my mantra throughout my childhood, and now it's in my adult life. I find that people really tend to relate to the immigrant father, whether he be Italian, Greek, Spanish or whatever.

Sebastian Maniscalco

We grew up in a middle-class family in Chicago. Even when we went on vacation as a family, it wasn't a really fun time, because my father didn't want to spend any money when we got there.

Sebastian Maniscalco