Tig Notaro Quotes

Author Image

Tig Notaro

Profession : Comedian

Birth : March 24, 1971

When I've had to edit my albums, I'll listen to it one time through, and I'll make edits. I want to remember to set up a camera to record myself listening to my set, because I don't even slightly crack a smile, I am just listening for technical details, and I look like somebody that has absolutely no sense of humor. I look insane.

Tig Notaro

It's almost embarrassing how much support I have. I mean, I always tell people I feel like I'm perfectly set up to have cancer. I have great health insurance, I have a savings account. I have work lined up. I have friends and family. I have the best doctors I can get.

Tig Notaro

I failed eighth grade twice, and then they moved me up to ninth grade. Then I failed that and dropped out. My teacher would hand me a test, and I'd grade it myself with an F, then put my head down on the desk.

Tig Notaro

I always think about the idea that God never gives you more than you can handle, and just the idea that God would be looking at me and thinking, 'Eh, I think she can handle more.' And the angels thinking, 'What are you doing? You're a lunatic.' And God being like, 'No, no, trust me. She can handle this.'

Tig Notaro

I want to be silly, and that's being authentic just as much as being open and honest. It's authentic to make weird clown horn noises when it strikes you.

Tig Notaro

When I was first asked for an autograph, I felt so uncomfortable that I just wrote, 'Tig's Autograph,' and from then on, that's what I write when I sign my name.

Tig Notaro

I love devastating movies, documentaries and hummingbirds (yes, in that order).

Tig Notaro

I didn't like to stop playing for a second to bother with eating or going to the bathroom. I was a really skinny kid, and I remember my mother always telling people, 'I don't know how she's alive. I think she gets all of her nutrients from air pollution.'

Tig Notaro

I have somebody I admire and want to keep at a distance. I've had the opportunity to meet her a couple of times - it's Chrissie Hynde from The Pretenders. I just am nuts about her, but I have no interest in meeting her because I just don't think she could live up to what she's been to me in my head.

Tig Notaro

The funny response to 'One Mississippi' continues to be that people don't know what is true and what's fiction.

Tig Notaro

I was very into animals and nature, and really obsessed with cats and monkeys. I used to play in the woods, wander off into the woods for hours. I'd bring a clipboard and think that I was doing some work out there, following the trails of raccoons or collecting bird feathers.

Tig Notaro

I don't want to take myself too seriously, thinking that I'm always having to be this cathartic, intense and deep person, because I certainly enjoy silliness.

Tig Notaro

I get kind of, um, bored by all the sexuality and gender labels because I feel like that's where the problem comes in, when people feel that they need to have these particular identities. If you didn't have these labels, and you just acted on how you genuinely felt at any point, then you wouldn't have anything to contend with.

Tig Notaro

I definitely still like writing one-liners, but I also think that I've changed a lot in that I've allowed myself freedom to grow.

Tig Notaro

In the past, I played in bands, worked at coffee shops, babysat, and worked as a production assistant.

Tig Notaro

People don't talk about small-town racism in Illinois or upstate New York. They're like, 'It's the South.' And it is. It's there. But it's everywhere. But everywhere, there are also amazing people.

Tig Notaro

I feel like I am the most hopeful person you could possibly meet.

Tig Notaro

As a kid, I loved Paula Poundstone and Richard Pryor. But my mother was a huge influence on my comedy.

Tig Notaro

Comedy was a secret want, but it wasn't anything I pursued.

Tig Notaro

I'm always going to do whatever I think is funniest. If something's dark, I'll do it.

Tig Notaro