Quotes for Funny

My uncle Sammy was an angry man. He had printed on his tombstone: What are you looking at?

Margaret Smith

If at first you don't succeed, blame your parents.

Marcelene Cox

Me carrying a briefcase is like a hotdog wearing earrings.

Sparky Anderson

Until you walk a mile in another man's moccasins you can't imagine the smell.

Robert Byrne

There's nothing wrong with being shallow as long as you're insightful about it.

Dennis Miller

The first day one is a guest, the second a burden, and the third a pest.

Jean de la Bruyere