Joe Rogan Quotes

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Joe Rogan

Profession : Comedian

Birth : August 11, 1967

Faith itself is a horrible mechanism that stunts the growth of ideas. It also stunts the act of questioning, and it does this by pushing the idea that you have to have faith - and that nothing has to be proven.

Joe Rogan

That's my only goal. Surround myself with funny people, and make sure everyone has a good time and works hard.

Joe Rogan

As a longtime practitioner of yoga and a person who's been involved in physical fitness my whole life, I can tell you, yoga helps you achieve altered states of consciousness. It is not just stretching. The only way you can say that it's stretching is if you haven't done it, or that you haven't done it rigorously for a long period of time.

Joe Rogan

Never stay in a bad marriage, and don't hang around with psycho coke fiends.

Joe Rogan

Phil Hartman was brilliant, and Dave Foley is a really funny guy. Phil Hartman was actually even funnier offstage than he was onstage because he would say nasty things. Dave Foley's very funny, very witty guy, very quick.

Joe Rogan

It's painful for me to watch someone who isn't funny. It's horrifying to sit in the back and watch some guy who just totally sucks.

Joe Rogan

I never in my wildest imagination dreamed that I would somehow become a sports commentator.

Joe Rogan

If you can lie, you can act, and if you can lie to crazy girlfriends, you can act under pressure.

Joe Rogan

I don't care if you're gay, black, Chinese, straight. That means nothing to me. It's all an illusion.

Joe Rogan

I see martial arts as moving forms of meditation. When you're sparring or drilling techniques, you can't think of anything else.

Joe Rogan

Reality really is theater. There's no other way to describe it. It's all so nonsensical, ridiculous and chaotic.

Joe Rogan

When you snatch little pieces of other people's lives and try to palm them off as your own, that's more disgusting than anything. Robin Williams is a huge thief. Denis Leary is a huge thief. His whole stand-up career is based on Bill Hicks, a brilliant guy who died years ago.

Joe Rogan

The only time I commit to conspiracy theories is when something way retarded happens. Like Lee Harvey Oswald acting alone.

Joe Rogan

On my left knee I have a long scar from an ACL operation. I've had both knees reconstructed.

Joe Rogan

My act is so completely and totally uncensored that the only way I could really pull it off is if I treat the audience like they're my best friends.

Joe Rogan

Have you ever talked to someone, and you're not even really talking to them? Actors are the worst for that.

Joe Rogan

I think that one of the reasons why people look towards the end of humanity is that people are afraid to die alone. If you die alone, the people you love will miss you, or if they die, you miss them - the sorrow is inevitable. When you truly love someone, the thought of losing them forever is horrible.

Joe Rogan

I talk so much about sex that girls just want to meet me.

Joe Rogan

People for the most part can smell lies.

Joe Rogan

If you are the greatest, why would you go around talking about it?

Joe Rogan