Nikki Glaser Quotes

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Nikki Glaser

Profession : Comedian

Birth : June 1, 1984

I just realized I have probably spent more time in a strip club than Rihanna has, and that is saying a lot because she goes a lot!

Nikki Glaser

I had a guy on Facebook for, like, years just asking if he could PayPal me money, and of course I have to say no when, really, I'm just like, 'Why wouldn't I? He doesn't want anything for it.'

Nikki Glaser

I'm in a relationship and have never been on Tinder as a single woman, but from what I have seen, I think it is always good to have a picture with an animal to show that you are kind.

Nikki Glaser

I was inspired by people telling me I should be a comedian. I tried it and had a really good first set, so I was like, 'OK, I'll do this forever'.

Nikki Glaser

I remember thinking years ago about getting a half special, 'When you get that, that will be it. That will be all you need to feel validated in this world.' I feel like that special was just another set.

Nikki Glaser

I have to say that it's fun to write for young girls, and it's exciting to know that we're influencing them and they're looking at us like, 'I want to grow up and be like them.' I mean, I just made up the person saying that.

Nikki Glaser

I'm so glad I'm not in college anymore. I'm so glad I'm not having kids.

Nikki Glaser

If anyone's going to bring about mass extinction, it'll be Donald Trump.

Nikki Glaser

Up until recently, I've said, 'I don't notice the sexism in the industry.'

Nikki Glaser

Things end in this business. Shows get canceled, or you walk away from them - but most likely, things get canceled.

Nikki Glaser

I've been saying inappropriate things since I was a kid.

Nikki Glaser

I just want to open people's eyes to different things.

Nikki Glaser

I was lucky enough to find stand-up really early in life. And I'm so grateful that I did, because the second I found it, I was like, 'I know what I want to do'.

Nikki Glaser

It strikes me as pretty interesting and cool how girls support each other in this business. I've never felt so much support in my life than from my fellow female comedians. I attribute much of my success to some of them.

Nikki Glaser

Nothing really shocks me anymore.

Nikki Glaser

All my life - middle school, high school - I've always been worried what are people going to think.

Nikki Glaser

When I did 'Nikki and Sara Live,' I think a lot of the comedy got lost because we were always so worried about how we looked, and so was the network.

Nikki Glaser

A lot of being a woman in this business is about how you look... That's not why we're even in this business; that's not what people want from us. We're valuable because we're funny and because we have a voice and a point of view.

Nikki Glaser

I'm sure I've already made some mistakes that I'll wish I could take back.

Nikki Glaser

I knew what I wanted to do, so I was constantly working on material once I got to KU.

Nikki Glaser