Robert Orben Quotes

Robert Orben

Profession : Entertainer

Birth : March 4, 1927

Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If Iā€™m not there, I go to work.

Robert Orben

If you can laugh together, you can work together.

Robert Orben

Every speaker has a mouth; An arrangement rather neat. Sometimes it's filled with wisdom. Sometimes it's filled with feet.

Robert Orben

Life was a lot simpler when what we honored was father and mother rather than all major credit cards.

Robert Orben

A graduation ceremony is an event where the commencement speaker tells thousands of students dressed in identical caps and gowns that 'individuality' is the key to success.

Robert Orben

Older people shouldn't eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get.

Robert Orben

To err is human - and to blame it on a computer is even more so.

Robert Orben

Quit worrying about your health. It will go away.

Robert Orben

Humor starts like a wildfire, but then continues on, smoldering, smoldering for years.

Robert Orben

In prehistoric times, mankind often had only two choices in crisis situations: fight or flee. In modern times, humor offers us a third alternative; fight, flee - or laugh.

Robert Orben

I remember when humor was gentle pokes. I used to call it 'arm around the shoulder' humor. Now they go for the jugular and they take no prisoners. It's mean, mean stuff.

Robert Orben

Inflation is bringing us true democracy. For the first time in history, luxuries and necessities are selling at the same price.

Robert Orben

A vacation is having nothing to do and all day to do it in.

Robert Orben

Every morning I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work.

Robert Orben

There's so much pollution in the air now that if it weren't for our lungs there'd be no place to put it all.

Robert Orben

Sometimes I get the feeling the whole world is against me, but deep down I know that's not true. Some of the smaller countries are neutral.

Robert Orben

Don't think of it as failure. Think of it as time-released success.

Robert Orben

Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work.

Robert Orben

Inflation is the crabgrass in your savings.

Robert Orben

Most people would like to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch.

Robert Orben