Quotes for Funny

I'm for whatever gets you through the night.

Frank Sinatra

Even Napoleon had his Watergate.

Yogi Berra

I read part of it all the way through.

Samuel Goldwyn

When you're in love it's the most glorious two and a half days of your life.

Richard Lewis

Let's have some new cliches.

Samuel Goldwyn

The way taxes are, you might as well marry for love.

Joe E. Lewis

I'm odd looking. Sometimes I think I look like a funny muppet.

Angelina Jolie

It's a funny feeling to work with people who you consider your colleagues and to realize that they actually are young enough to be your children.

Alan Alda

All these jokes have been pre-approved as funny by me.

Mitch Hedberg

I don't mean to be funny.

Yogi Berra

One thing the blues ain't, is funny.

Stephen Stills

This is the great thing about Northern Ireland. I walk down the street and people stop me and say things like, 'I know you. You're that wee golfer, aren't you?' I say, 'Yeah, that's me.' They say, 'Keep it up, wee man.' It's very funny and that's why I want to stay here as long as possible.

Rory McIlroy

Comedy is learning to be funny, and you learn to be funny in small rooms with young audiences.

Joan Rivers

It is really funny when people say you'd be obvious for a great villain.

Angelina Jolie

'Dirty Rotten Scoundrels' is a good one because it not only turned out, I think, to be a really funny movie but it was also a delight to shoot. We were in the South of France, working with Glenne Headly and Michael Caine and Frank Oz the director - who were just fun.

Steve Martin

I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.

W. C. Fields

I hate housework! You make the beds, you do the dishes and six months later you have to start all over again.

Joan Rivers

If you want a guarantee, buy a toaster.

Clint Eastwood

I drank some boiling water because I wanted to whistle.

Mitch Hedberg

Don't forget Mother's Day. Or as they call it in Beverly Hills, Dad's Third Wife Day.

Jay Leno